11th August 2010….

Please note that i don’t remember all of this day exactly, its hard to remember everything when you are being bombarded with so much information!

Some of what I write may not be exact but I will try my best to get it right! It is too hard for my partner to have to remember all of these events and I don’t like to ask other people so I’ll plod along as best I can!

I sat waiting with my partner and my Dad, waiting for someone to call my name, waiting to be given an answer to the biggest question I had hanging over my head!

None of us spoke, we just sat, watching, watching all the other people who sat waiting, they were also waiting for answers. Everyone’s answer would be different. We weren’t all there for the same reason.

I was in my own world again when my Partner very gently put her hand on my knee and said ‘its time’ My heart sank

I looked up and a nurse called my name for the second time.

I stood up & walked towards her, she had a very gentle voice and a kind forgiving face. I had a nice feeling about this lady.

I noticed how I felt calmer, I felt at ease.

Why did I feel like this now when only moments before I felt like my heart was going to pop out of my chest it was beating that hard!

I followed the nurse into a consulting room where another woman sat in a chair behind what looked like a giant desk! When I was in the room and sat in a chair next to the desk I realised that it wasn’t the desk that was huge, it was the woman that was tiny!

She introduced herself as one of the Drs on the neurology team (I don’t remember her name!)

She went through some of my medical notes with me and explained that she would be doing some neurological tests and asked me to make my way to the bed and sit on the side.

The lady Dr stood up and started to walk towards me, my goodness she was tiny in stature but huge in width! She was pregnant and looked as though she hadn’t got long left until due date!

I sat there in my own world again! I do this often! I often take myself into dream world when I should actually be concentrating on what I am being asked or told to do.

I just sat there on the side of the examining bed with my feet dangling just thinking do I take these trainers off? I couldn’t remember if I was asked to!

How odd is it that I can remember useless facts like this but not all of the tests that were done!

When the Dr got to me she started the tests by checking my vision, I was still blind in my periphery vision, I think I had started to get used to it if that was at all possible!

The Dr asked me to follow her finger with my eyes but to keep my head still, as I did this and she moved her finger to my right periphery, I lost site of her finger. She asked me to continue to look there and not move my eyes. Well, this seemed to be impossible! Every time I strained to keep my eye still it pulled back to the left! This was an extremely strange sensation! It felt so odd, as though I had no control whatsoever. I started to get upset so the Dr went onto a different test.

It seems such a blur all the tests she did and unfortunately i just can’t remember them all!

We moved to a different room when that Dr had finished doing her tests, again the friendly nurse followed us all into the room and sat at the end of the bed.

There was a happy looking Dr sitting at a desk, he stood and introduced himself ‘Dr Shehu’ I shook his hand and sat down next to the desk.

He sat and looked through my notes and asked me to explain to him my symptoms, I told him exactly what was written in my notes, I lost vision in my right eye!

He asked me to take off my shoes and socks and to lay on the bed. At this point all I could think of was ‘that’ appointment with the neurosurgeon! This time I didn’t have to strip down to my underwear, he draw the curtain around us and that lovely friendly nurse was right at the end of the bed!

He continued with even more tests, some which the pregnant Dr had already done and some new ones.

The sensory test is one that I remember, it involved the testing of the main parts of my body – face, trunk, arms, and legs – for differences in sensation. Sensitivity to touch was tested by the Dr simply by touching my skin and sensitivity to pain was tested with a pinprick. I was surprised with how little I could feel! It wasn’t something that I was aware of! After all I was here because I had lost sight in my right eye, right?

Once all the tests were complete Dr Shehu then handed me over to the friendly nurse that had been following us around….

To be continued…..